Dear Mom,

Your beautiful letter was such a holy and pure witness of one who loves the Lord and longs to experience the closeness of His presence during the difficult and sorrowful times of life. How true your feelings when you say that the Lord seems distant during times of confusion. I am certain that there are many who are reading your letter at this time and are eager to let you know that you are not alone. Let us begin this letter with a prayer.

Dearest Lord, You are our hearts' desire. You are so tender and gentle with such an amazing merciful love. Lord, show us that there is nothing that escapes Your care and in that we must take great comfort. Lord, there are so many times when I feel unworthy and it is in those times that I am filled with anxiety that Your love has been withdrawn from me. Lord, surround me with Your embrace and teach me gently once again the truth of Your overwhelming love and Your desire to guide and direct me. Lord, I love You and long to see Your face. Amen.

Dear one, when we are feeling that we are unworthy it is then that we can be certain that the Tempter is taking advantage of our frail nature. In this frail nature we are weakened and susceptible to his nigglings and whispers of untruth. Do you remember when the Lord was tempted in the desert? It was not at the beginning of His 40 day fast but towards the end of that time that the Tempter chose to surround the sweet Jesus with temptation. Having homeschooled as long as you have you are surely tired at times and experiencing a weariness of spirit that may pervade your heart and make it difficult to see clearly. As our children mature it is a fact that the challenges that we face will grow with them. I have a dear friend that likes to say 'little kids, little challenges; bigger kids, bigger challenges'. Don't you find that to be true?

Remember that the Tempter wants most of all to destroy our peace and our resolve. He wants us to feel separated from the Lord. He wants us to feel that the Lord has left us and finds us unworthy. Nothing could be farther from the truth. In fact it is in those times of greatest confusion that the Lord is holding us closer than we can imagine.

When I go through seasons such as you are describing I find that the only way I can cope is to pray that much harder. I want to blame myself entirely for every challenge that I face. I want to think of these challenges as punishment for my failings. While it is true that some consequences are the result of poor judgment, it is also true that the Lord does not punish us with hardship. Jesus waits for our 'yes' to His plan and then allows us to work through the plan that He has for us. There are to be sure times of sorrow and hardship but we must focus our efforts on the goodness of the Lord and see beyond the hardship to the end of the journey and our Heaven home.

Our entire journey on this earth is about our Heaven Home. Keep that uppermost in your heart. I go to confession first thing when I am feeling as you describe. In the beauty of this curative sacrament I am able to find solace for those times I fell short. I receive the forgiveness of the Lord and in that I can experience the fullness of His love. Jesus desires that we get past those times that we sin and to move forward into the work He has for us. His forgiveness is so tender and merciful that it is beyond our human comprehension to fully understand.

I would suggest that you sit quietly before the Blessed Sacrament and allow the Lord to embrace you during this time. Speak to the Lord and pour out your sufferings to Him. In His great mercy the Lord will answer you with all the compassion of one who loves beyond the beyond.

I admire you greatly and find in your letter and in your spirit a woman of great faith and one who is longing to do the will of the Father. You are a true child of the Lord and His precious daughter. Take heart in His love for you and let His love surround You and give you comfort. Do not let the Tempter steal your peace. You have the same authority as that of Jesus to say 'Begone Satan'. Trust in the Lord's desire to show you the way.

Sending out a prayer,

Rita Munn