Dear Mom,

Your wonderful and thoughtful question is quite timely. Several of my Catholic homeschooling friends and I were recently discussing this very issue. I was inspired by the combined wisdom of these hardworking, spiritual ladies and decided to pass along some of their ideas.

Start early with the shopping, even to the point of wrapping the gifts (children and others really do not mind what type of wrapping paper is used). This practice gives you a feeling of calm when the world is telling you to rush, rush, and rush. You sit back and remind yourself that Christmas is wrapped and ready to go and has been that way since September.

Shop yard sales and tag sales throughout the year for bargains, if that is your style. It seems that the feelings of being pushed financially deprive many families of a sense of calm that is so important during Advent.

Go slowly into Advent. Every time you feel yourself wanting to dash to the stores to snatch up the latest bargains or items, stop and say a Hail Mary very slowly. Remind yourself that Advent is a time to concentrate on the coming of Jesus into our darkened world.

Start a tradition of hand making many of the gifts you give to family and friends. Again begin early. These gifts will be a visible sign to your children that a gift is a token of our love or esteem, not a dollar for dollar symbol of that love.

Be deliberate in your practices of Advent spirituality. Making the Advent wreath, lighting the candles each evening during family prayers, saying the prayers and reflecting each and every day upon the Scripture readings will definitely set the tone for Advent. The readings are perfectly selected to compliment the liturgical season of waiting and repentance. Make a Jesse Tree complete with ornaments.

Enjoy special music during Advent that fits the mood of this time. Save Christmas carols and the like for the days following Christmas.

Refrain from "decorating" and fussing with lights and all the trappings of Christmas until a time that is very close to Christmas day. Decorating for a wondrous and joyful holyday is good and beneficial, but in keeping with the season of Advent, there should not be the celebration of Christmas until the day has arrived.

Send Christmas greetings and cards after Christmas has arrived. When everyone else has long forgotten the cards and their messages inside, your greetings will arrive. The mom who shared this had another benefit to add to this practice. If you wait until after Christmas to buy your cards, fantastic bargains can be had. Because the pace has slowed, you will have time to sit and carefully write out your greetings. I laughed and agreed with her heartily. One Christmas I gave birth on Dec. 13. My Christmas cards did not get sent until Valentine's Day. Since I was not in a hurry to have my greetings arrive before Dec. 25th, I took my time and enjoyed writing letters about my new son's birth.

When the Christmas tree goes up in the house, it seems that the "season" begins. If your family will not mind, wait until the last few days before Christmas to bring in the tree. Save Christmas Eve for the official lighting. Decorate the tree slowly and let the children continue to decorate it with handmade treasures until Epiphany.

We like to bake and make treats that are unique for Christmas. These I will work on through the days of Advent, hiding the goodies in the pantry until Christmas Eve. After Christmas Eve Mass our family comes home, opens Champagne, has a wonderful spread of treats and opens the gifts one by one. Everyone watches as each one takes a gift to be opened. We are usually up until the wee hours. My children call this the "Celebration." The practice actually got started many years ago, when I was unable to pull together Christmas (lots of little people to work around) until that time.

All the mothers I spoke with, felt the way you do. The general consensus was that allowing the secular world to steal the quiet, peaceful, and rich spirituality of Advent was sad. They, like yourself, said that it takes a great deal of resolve to stand in the face of the secular practices and reclaim the spirituality. However all agreed that working to do this would benefit our children and our own spirituality during this season.

Our Catholic faith is beautiful in the completeness with which we are allowed to practice our faith. Think about all the opportunities we as Catholics have in our communities to prepare for the coming of Jesus. Penance services, Advent, Scripture readings, and a real desire to focus on the deeper meaning of Christmas are encouraged by our church. Praise God.

I admire your resolve and your desire to reclaim the meaning of Christmas. I am certain that through prayer you will be inspired by the Holy Spirit to begin in small ways at first until you have completed the goal.

Dear Jesus, we ask for a spirit of quiet and calm during this holy season of Advent. Slow us down, Lord, and allow us to savor the teachings and inspiration from holy Scripture. Give us a feeling of peace. Your peace, Lord, is a treasure of unimagined value. Yet such a gift is given freely to all who come to Your Sacred Heart. We love You, dear Lord, and await the celebration that calls us to contemplate the mystery and wonder of Your love for us. Embrace us in Your heart and hide us there to receive the comfort we need. Lord, we ask a special blessing upon all families that are burdened with financial problems or separation during this holy time. Lord, we ask that all families are well fed, protected, and warm this Christmas. Amen.

Sending out a prayer,
Rita Munn