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Question: I have been praying about homeschooling for 2 years now. I am currently a teacher in a Catholic school. Although I love being a teacher, my first job is to teach my own children. I long to spend all day with them, and am so excited about homeschooling. I have prayed through my fears and worries about leaving our current school. I know God is calling me to homeschooling. Every lesson I plan for my class this year, I can imagine how wonderful it would be to do this for my own girls (ages 7 and 11). My question is that I am concerned that my husband doesn't really like the idea of homeschooling. He thinks that our children are in a wonderful school....they are. He is very comfortable leaving them there. How can we both be called to different choices? Is there anything else I can do but keep praying? I know that I need his complete support and agreement to do this. I am beginning a novena today, as I have to sign my contract for next year in a few more weeks. Thank you for any help you can give.
Answer:

Dear Mom,

I believe it to be a holy and pure witness that first admits to praying sincerely for the knowledge to know the Lord's will. The truth that we as Catholics must assure ourselves of is that of the Lord's desire to show us the way He would have us go. We understand through our desire to do the Lord's will that in that alone we will have comfort and empowerment to do what some would see as impossible to achieve.

Speak with your husband candidly to determine his accurate feelings about homeschooling. It is surprising to me the number of times one assumes to know another mind only to discover that our presumptions were false. It could be that your husband is worried about the loss of income resulting from your desire to homeschool. However remember that a teacher of your caliber and compassion will always be able to find ways to market your skill in teaching though not on the most grandest of scales perhaps but still supply a financial gain that can make a true difference. It could be that your husband worries for the isolation that he thinks will befall your daughters. Again I have seen just the opposite in my own personal experience. Children find each other given wholesome opportunities to do so. Perhaps he is concerned that persons in your town will 'talk' unkindly of your family now that you have changed paths. Remember that true friends are those that remain despite a change in direction. You and your husband will most certainly enjoy all the benefits of friends in your current circle but in a new circle as well. I was amazed at the number of Catholic families we met through homeschooling. The beauty of this was of course our shared interest in homeschooling. It was as though I had found several kindred spirits who shared not only my Catholic homeschooling journey but the journey of faith.

Sometimes when we moms feel passionate about a particular course of action we are eager to begin with an all or nothing mindset. Perhaps you could approach homeschooling from a notion that you are willing to see year by year. This is how I began homeschooling 12 years ago. I wanted to take a year to see if we preferred the homeschooling lifestyle to our current lifestyle. However secretly in my heart I was praying that the experience would be such a positive one as to convince any doubt my husband or myself might have had.

I mentioned that homeschooling is a lifestyle and indeed it is. The rhythm of your home will decidedly change in that your home becomes a school and your day to day priorities change as well. In other words, the dishes piled up waiting for a wash is not nearly as important as the math lesson or the writing assignment that needs to be taught. Time with friends will have to be tempered against the demands of your homeschool. Yet I feel that your being a teacher will give you an advantage that perhaps others who are not teachers do not enjoy. For example it really does become a matter of setting priorities that are reasonable and doable. Certainly your classroom experience has taught you this. Are fractions really the priority when over half the class does not understand the principles of addition and subtraction? I believe you understand my point.

I admire you greatly and see in you a mom who has a heart for teaching and more importantly for teaching her children. This is never a negative idea. Continue in your prayers. Ask that the Lord show you a sign or give you a sense of direction. Jesus will honor that request. He loves us too much to leave us orphans with our troubles. Remember that the Lord is not a God of confusion. He abhors confusion and works within our lives through our docility of spirit to banish confusion that we might know His will and live accordingly. To live within the Lord's will for us is to experience peace despite hardship.

Jesus, we know that You love us beyond our human comprehension to understand such a love. We bring to You now the prayers of all moms who are working to discern Your will with regards to the homeschooling journey. Lord, we trust that You will lift the veil of confusion and empower each through the Holy Spirit to know Your will, follow Your will and to find the peace that passes all human understanding in the work of that will on our lives. We pray also for those families that feel they are deeply confused and feel that they are presented with no options. Lord, send persons into their lives that will bring Your light and healing. Amen.

Sending out a prayer,

Rita Munn

   
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