Dear Parent,

How frustrated you and your daughter must feel. To be asked to leave a school and then to go from a parish school to a public school are going to have an emotional impact on parent and child.

Since you mention underachievement, do you possibly suspect a learning disability? You may wish to have your daughter tested to determine if a learning disability such as dyslexia could be the underlying cause of underachievement and a negative attitude. You can find resources for parents at Learning Disabilities Association of America at https://ldaamerica.org/.

If you believe that the negative attitude may be willfulness, then you need to address this behavioral issue before you will be able to home school effectively. I can understand that you are feeling fed up. Your daughter probably senses this and may be reacting to it. Perhaps a brief break of two weeks from academic schooling may help. For two weeks, work at communicating with her.  Ask her how she is feeling about the situation with the Catholic school, the situation at home, and the situation in a public school. And be prepared to listen. She may need to sort through a jumble of feelings and ideas. Communicating doesn't mean that she can be disrespectful or disobedient. Do chores, play games that require some thought or creativity or strategy, and read together during this time. Perhaps reading a fiction story about a girl who feels confused or out of place may open up the conversation. One that comes to mind is Texas Tomboy by Lois Lenski and Cotton in My Sack also by Lenski.

Dr. Ray Guarendi, a Catholic psychologist and father, may be able to offer you some expert advice with more information about your daughter. His web site is www.drray.com. He has a call-in radio show as well.

Once you have a better idea what is causing the underachievement and negative attitude, you can begin to move forward. You will want to move at your daughter's own pace regardless of her academic level because you don't want to bring that frustration back. 

God bless you and your family,

Sandra Garant